I hate public transport

I hate public transport

I went to Birmingham today. Exciting, eh? Well, I took the train! The train is a marvelous invention and the pinnacle of British Engineering. However… I should have taken the fucking car. This is why:

  1. My car is never late – it’s always where I expect it to be at the time I expect it to be there. The train never fails to be late.
  2. It takes 35 mins to drive from here to Birmingham… the train takes 45.
  3. It costs about £11 in fuel to drive to Birmingham from here. The train cost £14.
  4. It is generally assumed that I can use my car at any time. An ‘any time day return’ train ticket apparently means ‘any time as long as it’s a Virgin train’. Where the fuck was the warning of that..?
  5. There’s always enough seats for everyone in my car – the police get pissy if there’s not. The train has seats for only 1/2 the passengers.
  6. My car carries no cocky teenagers who think they own the place. Those found on the train are rather set to own criminal records and children by the age of 15.

To summarize… fuck the environment. Next time, I’m driving.

2 comments

  1. I like how you mentioned that I was there, suffering alongside you.

    You forgot to mention the wanna be rapers and the smelly foreign people. …European foreign people, for clarification. Americans don’t smell.

    x

    • I didn’t mean rapers, I meant rappers, however, the wanna be rapists were probably there as well.

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